Highland Combi Adventure 2005

VW Combi, Highlands, nr Spean Bridge
Originally uploaded by rtw2007.

Half term, October 2006: the test trip that started it all.

Having seen an old VW surfer-style camper van chugging up the motorway one day, we started to ponder the idea of buying something similar and heading east on a long overland trip. We vaguely mooted the idea of a year long trip driving from London to Japan. The fact that we had no idea whatsoever how feasible that was did not in any way curb our enthusiasm.

But you don’t embark on a long journey around the world like that without having some idea of whether your relationship and sanity will survive a year on the road in a van only marginally bigger than a sardine can. So we decided that a trip in a hired van driving around the north coast of Scotland might be a good test run.

We stuck to the original plan of an old school VW combi and hired Hectar from Kamper Hire (www.kamperhire.co.uk) for nine days. Hectar was great - a bright blue and white 1975 edition VW with a spare tyre for a nose. He was like a wendy house on wheels, with dinky furniture, roll out bed and pop-top roof. His quirks made him all the more attractive. The fact that we could see the road passing beneath us through a hole in the floor around the gear stick didn’t seem to matter, mainly because we were distracted by the constant battle of trying to get Hectar into gear, which was not the easiest of tasks.

Hectar certainly gave us the freedom we were looking for - there was no need to find hotels or B&Bs in remote Highland villages. We pretty much decided on a day-to-day basis where we fancied going, there being no constraints other than the need to return to work on the following Monday. We developed a real affection for Hectar and he found himself featuring in a huge number of photos around the north coast of Scotland.

But then the weather set in. Heavy rain, high winds and looming skies. It lasted (bar a glorious sunny day on the sandy beach at Gairloch) for much of the trip. Sitting in Hectar in the lashing rain suddenly made his sardine tin like qualities seem like his most prominent features. We found ourselves driving along wearing every item of clothing we had with us, desperately tying to absorb some of the very limited heat being churned out by the dashboard heaters before it disappeared into the ether. Hectar certainly wasn’t great at holding onto that heat. The standard camper van tagline is “Home is where you park it” - that is true, but only if your home is very small, cold and damp for much of the time. Suddenly, Hectar’s quirks seemed a little less attractive. We ate more fried breakfasts, cups of tea and fish and chips in a week that we usually would in several months, just to give us some warmth and blubber to keep us going.

Hectar has since had a face lift, which is just as well given that part of the roof blew off one windy and fairly stressful day on the Isle of Skye. Hopefully he is now off enjoying trips out to sunny summer festivals, where he will no doubt be far more at home than he was in the Highlands in the pouring rain. We meanwhile, had decided that whilst we could (just about and by no means without some tetchy moments) cope with each other’s company in such a confined space, that space would have to be a little more watertight and homely.

Which led us on to the next stage of our plans.......

Highland Combi Adventure 2005 itinerary:

Day 1: London to Yorkshire to stay with mum in Silkstone overnight. She clearly wondered how we were going to survive the week in Hectar. Given that she can barely cope on a trip without an iron, this was not an adventure to which she could easily relate.

Day 2: Via a meeting with our wedding photographer at Rudding Park (where we felt rather self conscious driving up in a 1970s combi rather than a Rolls Royce, which would have been more appropriate) we headed up through the North East for a stop at the Angel of the North before going on to Peebles. Not the most glamorous of stops, you might think, but we felt distinctly underdressed in the pub wearing jeans, given that we spotted a couple who clearly had aspirations to be the Gavin and Charlotte of Scotland. She was dressed mainly in St Tropez, with a small glitzy sequined number to cover the bear essentials - no coat, of course, despite the freezing temperatures - it would have ruined the look. He teamed a kilt with the latest designer clobber and even more St Tropez than his girlfriend, his hair gelled in spikes high enough to make Mr Henson proud.

Day 3: From Peebles we headed into Edinburgh, though we were clearly in the wrong mood for cities as we were distinctly underwhelmed, such that we ate, wandered for a bit and then headed back into the countryside. Next stop was Dunkeld, a surprisingly pretty place, where we took a slightly scary walk from our van across some dodgy bridges and through some none too safe looking tunnels to a couple of pubs for yet more “something with chips” and a chat with the locals about Polish immigration and the like.

Day 4: Peebles to John O’Groats via some craggy eastern coastal scenery and a storm which was sufficiently fierce to make the coastal road a bit hair raising. People in Wick were shopping away in the supermarket as though this was normal. We wanted to wander around telling them to look outside where it appeared to us that the apocalypse was taking place. They seemed unperturbed. We ventured into the pub in John O’Groats for some food, but faced with listening to endless machismo from the souped up Ford owners who had just driven Lands End to John O'Groats, we opted to head back to Hectar for some much needed sleep.

Day 5: After a disturbed night parked outside the house of one of the dodgiest people we have ever met, where Hectar was rocked none too gently by the storms, we left John O’Groats for the sea stacks, arches and deep rock clefts of Duncansby Head. The area is stunning - more northerly and far more appealing than the tourist trap at John O’Groats, yet apparently little visited by Lands End to John O’Groaters and other day trippers. From there we continued around the north coast, heading west, via a work crisis in Thurso (Blackberrys being the evil gadgets that they are). Then down the west coast, past the white beaches of Durness and the lochs of the North West Highlands to Inchnadamph (for some good pub food and an encounter with what sounded like wolves but were most likely just particularly vocal Highland cattle).

Day 6: To Gairloch via the coastal roads of the Wester Ross peninsulas. Tea and cake in a traveller-style café in Gairloch, followed by fish and chips washed down with local beer.

Day 7: The sun shone and suddenly Hector seemed right at home. After a great breakfast we headed to Gairloch beach. Bizzare after all the storms to suddenly be on a deserted white sandy beach in a remote part of the Highlands with the sun shining and not a cloud in the sky. It felt more like Cornish surfing territory than remote Scotland. After a short walk we drove to Eilean Donan for the obligatory photo shoot, though the photos are never quite as impressive as the sight of the castle as you round the corner from the Kyle road and catch sight of the curved bridge and the castle for the first time and in the sunshine. Then on to Skye, supposedly to drive to Portree with great views of the Cuillin ridge. Instead, the winds reappeared and Hectar’s ventilation chimney disappeared, suddenly remerging in the rear view mirror as it pelted down the road behind us, leaving a gaping hole in our roof. Michael sprinted down the road for a successful chimney rescue attempt and the rest of the journey to Portee was spent trying to hold the chimney and the roof down until we could repair it. Two rolls of duct tape and several shoe laces later, Hector’s roof was in good enough shape to at least sleep under, but by the we were sick of him and opted for the pub, a curry and a bed in a B&B instead.

Day 8: A wander around Portree in the morning, followed by a long drive to Penrith for more beer and some horse / camel / pig racing at the local pub’s race night with Chris.

Day 9: Another long drive, from Cumbria to London.

Day 10: Bye bye to Hectar and the end of Highland Combi Adventure 2005.